Minding the Mind

Hello Hatters,

I suppose my childhood fears still haunt me. I have a sense of dread when rainstorms bring rising waters in my backyard.  It’s hard to shake, but not impossible.  I know that my faith teaches me to rely on the strength of the Lord, especially when I am rattled.

I open the curtains to watch the rain, face my fears, and pray.  I find that I thank God that the rain is gentle right now and the waters are receding.  My rescue doggie is on my lap for comfort.  She was found living on the streets.  Weather surely traumatized her.  Even though she has been with me for 18 months, her auto response is fear and trembling when lightning, thunder, and rain appear.

I get it.  She comes to me for reassurance and I go to God for reassurance.

Today is trash day and the rain is simply a drizzle now, so I pause to bring in the recycle bin.  I’d like a pass on this whole recycling of fears, thank you very much!

I am ever so grateful for the wise counsel I’ve received about childhood fears. Acknowledge them, name them, and then respond with my adult sensibilities.  I’ve done this routine dozens of times.  Grace for myself grants me as many times as necessary to face these times that trigger past memories of living through three floods.

The thing I know is that we all face things that unnerve us.  Unfortunately, our world has been broken and we have troubles.  But, the sun eventually comes out, and we keep on living.  For me, I surrender my world to the writing of my journey in hopes that someone else can relate and thus take comfort that none of us are alone on the way.

First and foremost, God is always with us.  My family and friends know I have issues and they walk with me in support.  I walk with them.  What makes me rattle doesn’t make others rattle.  It’s okay.  I’m accepted and loved and I accept and love.

I had a weird dream the other day.  In my dream, I went into my refrigerator and found shelves of black and white converse shoes.  No food, just shoes.  Somewhere, there’s a message in that dream.  Perhaps it’s that my triggered fears are as useful as a refrigerator full of shoes.  I have to take out the shoes and put them in their place. Then, I have to fill my refrigerator with nutritious food.  Sounds very much like the process of replacing the irrational with the rational.

Well, the sun is shining, my dog has stopped shivering, and this writer, who wears many hats just like you, bids you a refreshed day.

Until next time, I send you my prayers.

MT Penny